VANDAL ATTACKS NEIGHBOUR'S BUSH [02/07/07 10:30:37]

A mindless act of vandalism has soured relations between the club and one of its neighbours. Yesterday, in broad daylight, a short, rotund, balding, bearded individual was seen emerging from the clubhouse before wrecking a valuable bush in an property on the boundary.

The neighbour (who cannot be named for legal reasons) was understandably upset and between sobs last night said, "Who could have done this. My bush is really special to me and I am proud of it. I keep it freshly clipped and nicely trimmed at all times and visitors to my house always remark upon how well it looks".

ADCC are anxious to apprehend the culprit and have taken the unusual step of releasing stills taken from the CCTV in which the perpetrator of the crime can be clearly seen.

They hope that this visual will jog memories and that information might be forthcoming which would lead to an early arrest.

House-to-house enquires began this morning and it is understood that the incident will be screened on Crimewatch tonight.

The club's Head of Secret Police was today out of the area seeking counselling after introduction of the no smoking laws may have prejudiced his chances of being appointed as the new manager at Manchester City. Not surprisingly, he was unavailable for comment.